The White Guy

(Shake My Head). I honestly don't know what I was thinking. So after living with Amy, I finally decided to venture out on my own. I found a cute little one bedroom apartment for $600. Oh the good ol' days! So I had this neighbor, yes a next door neighbor and he was about 5 feet tall and semi- bald. We made small talk as a headed to work in the morning or when I came back from school in the evenings. He was cordial and invited me over for a martini. Well, I never had a martini before and I was very young and naive back then. So I walked the whole 5 steps from my front door to his. Let me just say that the martini was very strong.....I'm going to spare you the rest of the details. The next day, I walked the shameful, regretful 5 steps back to my front door. I immediately went to my bathroom and threw up. I called in sick for the rest of the day and by the end of the week I had moved out of my apartment and in with my parents. You live and learn.

Amy

Amy was my second roommate. She was into way more things than I was used to. She was all about going to the strip clubs and partying. Everytime I got in her car she would play Back Back by Lil O. Lord, she use to wear that song out. Anyways, one day, I looked for my next set of checks and I notice they were missing. All of a sudden, my account was negative almost $5000! OMG! What in the world is going on? I immediately went to Amy and she had told me what she'd done. The bank cleared out my account and I was in the clear. Trifling. Soon after that, my guy (Q) came to me with a heavy burden. He told me that he had did something in his past and he was going to have to turn himself in. I was so scared because I was so in love with him. He told me that he would be gone for about 30 days and that he wanted to marry me. The very next day he turned himself in. I didn't know what I was going to do with myself. We sent letters to each other every other day. I moved out from Amy because she was bad business. She ended up stealing my checks again and I called the police on her. I wonder how that ended.......

Quinton

Sorry for the wait. Let me continue on this journey. So I moved in with my sister after the fight with Cat. It was cool for a while until Quinton started spending too much time at the apartment. We were a "sort of" item now. I was happy to have him in my life and I was thirsty for the attention. I came home and the tv was mssing out of the living room. I immediately called my sister and told her what happened. We called the police and they took the report. My sister then broadcasted to the family that Quinton had stolen from her. Seriously? Don't be jealous that I got a man and you don't! I defended Quinton for as long as I could until....one day...... I called Quinton and the number was disconnected. What? Um, ok let me try again. Called again and again and again. Same response. How does that happen? How do you talk to someone daily and then they just disappear at the drop of a hat.  We no longer worked together because we were an item now so he told me that he was going to take another job at Crisco. So me and my investigative detectiveness (yep I made up that word) called Crisco. I got all the way to HR and asked if Quinton worked there. The woman told me that she was unable to give me that information. My heart was broken. Months went by with no word from Quinton. What are my options? I guess I just have to let it go. It sucked becauses I had slept with Quinton and now he's gone. No call no show. I continued on with my life as normal. Work and school until one day.  I had a work friend Amy and we were walking down to our cars after our shift. There was a note on my car. There was a guy at the job that was scoping me out so I thought it was him. The note said, "Hey Ms. Katy call me at 713-***-****". So I called the number. I said, "someone at this number left a note on my car." And wouldn't you know, it was Quinton. Back from the dead. Oh my Gosh! Since Cat and I didn't work out I moved in with Amy. It was a small apartment in the ghetto but hey, I was living my life. Quinton came over damn near every day and Amy liked him so in my book, that was a good sign. Amy was into stolen checks. Well. I was strapped for cash one day and I asked Amy for advice. Well you know what she said. And you I did it. Don't judge me.  A few more months went by I realized that I hadn't had a period. I didn't know what to do. Amy went with me to get a pregnancy test. I peed on the stick and there was two lines! I must have stared at that stick for hours. 

CAT

Cat was very good at what she did. She fit right in with my family, which is very hard to do. She would come with me to my weekly visits to my grandparents house, talk to my parents on the phone. If you didn't know any better, you would think she was my sister. Until one day......

Cat and I had been at each others throats for weeks. The petty nick picking about the littlest things became a daily routine. Even though we had an apartment together, we drifted quickly apart. Mind you, I've never lived with anyone before so I'm still new to this whole roommate thing.

Well, it finally got to the point that we were not going to renew our lease. I came home from school one day and there was a voice mail (yes we actually had a house phone back then). The voice mail stated that they were calling to verify the cancellation of phone services...Ummm, what? Cancellation of services....did she just cancel the phone on me? Oh My God! Well I can do one better. The electricity was in my name so I called and set up a cancellation date for the lights. AND, I'm leaving the phone off the hook so she can't use it. Ok, so I pretend to have big britches but I'm still a scaredy cat. I called Quinton to come over before I took the phone off the hook. He said he'd be right over. You know, sometimes the hints are right in front of you and you still chose to ignore them. Quinton didn't make it to the apartment until the middle of the night. I called him when I got out of school at 3pm. You do the math. Signs, read the signs. Anyways, Cat came home as I was talking to my grandparents about how evil she had become. Cat jumped in on the other phone and began to tell her side of the story. WHO DOES THAT? Not only that but I came to find out later that Cat also called my parents and the sad part is that my mother took her side.

So, after I hung up the phone with my grandparents, I raced out of my room where Cat was standing. I walked into the kitchen and asked her what the hell was going on. I don't remember exactly what she said because I blacked out. All I remember hearing was her screaming, "You're the DEVIL!" I snapped. I lunged at her and started pulling and twisting anything I could grab. My heart was racing out of control. There was no one there to stop us or pull us off each other. But somehow the fight ended. I walked to my room, and immediately placed my hamper in front of my door thinking that would stop her from entering my room while I was sleep. I called Quinton again but of course he didn't answer. I was so pissed but more so hurt that this girl I let come into my world, meet my family, and lived with betrayed me the way she did. AND she called me the devil. How dare she. I moved out the next day. I didn't care that the lease wasn't up. I needed to be away from this evil roommate. And now you know about my one and only physical fight. 

Jackson

So Jackson and I continued to talk every now and then after the Love Jones. Yes, that's what I'm calling it. Every time I see that movie I'm instantly taken back to that place and time on the couch....Anyways, Jackson continued to page me all the time. I was starting to get tired of the "I really like you but if we go out 'the cheerleader' might see us and I just don't want to deal with that" excuses. It frustrated me that Jackson took my virginity/(slash I gave it up) and now he doesn't want to be seen in public with me. I would go and tell Rick all about him. How much I liked Jackson and how badly he treated me. I'm sure Rick got tired of hearing me talk about Jackson all the time.

Well on this one particular day, Jackson called me from work. He asked me to come up there and buy an open item for him. An open item was merchandise that was resealed at the store. Like someone bought a dvd player, opened it, and then returned it to the store. The store would reseal the box and the dvd player was now an "open item". Anyways, employees were not allowed to buy open items. Since this wasn't the first time Jackson had asked me to do this I didn't think anything of it. He would give me the money and I would purchase these random :open items". The prices ranged from $50-$100. So I drove up to his job. I hadn't seen him in a while and was just happy to be seen at his job with him. Hey, I took advantage of every opportunity. So I walk into the store and I wait in line with this "open item." It's a speaker box, you know, one of the floor speakers that came to about your waist. I buy the item and Jackson walks me out to the car. Something didn't seem right. I asked Jackson why he asked me and not the cheerleader to come and buy this open item for him. He gave me the run around that they weren't together anymore and that he had feelings for me. (Insert eye rolling) As we approached the car, the box jingled a little.Wait a minute, this is a speaker box....was there not a speaker in it? I asked Jackson what was in the box. He looked as if he was shocked that I even asked the question. He said, "A whole bunch of stuff." He opened part of the box and I looked inside.

"So you're stealing...you're a thief?! And now I'm a thief for helping you."

I can't believe how stupid I was for ever thinking there was something between Jackson and I. I can't believe he stole all that stuff inside of a speaker box. There were phones, cd's, computers, etc. You name it, it was probably in the box. And again, this wasn't my first time doing this for him. The speaker may have said $98 on the price tag but there was well over $500 worth of stuff inside that box. I am so naive. I drove off and  just like that, Jackson and I were over. I've never heard from him again. 

The Roomate

So I've mentioned Cat was my roommate during this time in my life. But I need for you to fully grasp the craziness of this chic. So here it goes.

Cat was from Fort Worth, TX where over half of the university was from. We had similar features and started off complimenting each other pretty well. When I first met Cat, I walked into the classroom and she had on the same outfit I did. We were inseparable after that. Cat's lease was up at the end of the year and we decided to get an apartment together that was less than 5 minutes from campus. I'd never lived with anyone but family so this was a totally new experience for me. Our apartment was on the 3rd floor and it was 1,200 square feet. We paid like $600 a month for rent....ahhh the good ol' days. Anyways, Cat and I signed a six month lease. When we first moved in together I was still in love with Jackson.

Ok so here's the skinny on Jackson. He played on the basketball team in high school. He "dated" this chic that was a year under us that was a cheerleader. Well, they started having problems and Jackson and I started talking. It was pretty innocent at first until he started paging me everyday before I got home from school. We liked each other but the cheerleader was a beast and apparently wasn't over Jackson. She would call my phone and say, "Do you know that Jackson just came over to my house? He just pushed me down the stairs...is that the kind of guy you want to be with?" Puuuhhhllease. The cheerleader was full of drama and I was trying to stay as far away from her as I could....but I really liked Jackson. This was my first but definitely not last experience as the side chic.

Back to my story... so when Cat and I got this apartment, I invited Jackson over. I was so excited. Cat said that she wouldn't come out of her room the entire night. She even cooked dinner for us. Jackson came over and we ate and watch Love Jones. We started fooling around and things got hot and heavy. I felt so clueless but it felt good so why not. We moved to my bedroom and one thing led to another. Jackson pulled down his pants and oh my God. Is that what it looks like? I've never seen one of those before! He tries to put it in.....words could not describe the pain. How can something so big go into something so small? Jackson tried again.....agony I'm in pure agony! He kept going another two or three times. I was blinking back the tears. Thank God it was pitch dark in my room. And what was he wiping? He had taken off his t shirt and after pulling out he wiped something on his shirt. Is it over? I guess so. Jackson pulled up his pants and I put my clothes back on and walked him to the door. He said he'd call me later. I said ok and watched him walk down the stairs. I immediately had to pee so bad. OHHHH MYYY GOD everything burns. It burns so bad my legs are shaking. Am I going to die? I wiped and there was blood...is that normal? Too many questions and no answers. I crawled into bed with Cat. She looked and me and immediately knew what had just happened. I told her it burned and she said, "You're not a virgin anymore."

Ekon

Ekon was a simple guy. Besides the loud crazy clothes, he was very chill. He loved his electronics and his basketball. We hung out on the regular and really got to know each other more. One night, after one of the study groups, Ekon came into my room.

He asked, "Can I talk to you for a second?"
I said sure and cut the television down.

Ekon said, "So, (clears his throat) I know we've been hanging out quite a bit."
Oh, Lord...where is this going? All kinds of thoughts started rushing through my mind.

He continues, "I think you are a really cool chic that I'd like to get to learn more about."
My heart is beating a mile a minute...you know, to the point where you can feel it in your feet.

"I wanted to know if you'd like to go out with me?"
And there it was.....the question that changes relationships. I'm 19....I've been sheltered my entire life. Going from church to private school to public school, and now college. I don't know the first thing about being in a relationship. So I did what I do best.

"Ekon, are you serious? I mean, no offense but I see you more like a twin brother than I do a boyfriend." Yep, I did it again. Apparently, I didn't learn my lesson with Rick and God felt the need for me to repeat that lesson with Ekon and I still didn't get the hint. Let me back track (which I'll do a lot so get used to it). I am physically attracted to light skinned guys, you know, the yellow bones. I'm chocolate and for some reason I had this idea that I didn't want chocolate kids and if I got with a chocolate guy my kids would be like blackulas. Yes I just made that word up (I'll do that a lot as well). Both Rick and Ekon are brown skinned (which there is nothing wrong with). Anyways, Ekon lowered his head and walked out of my room. I turned the volume back up and continued to watch tv. Not even realizing I just let another good guy go......

Introduction

Graduation 1999
I'm so glad that's over. I definitely had the time of my life! Our family moved from Friendswood, TX to Humble, TX less than a month after I graduated. So I get to start all over again. I was accepted to University of Houston- Main Campus and was comforted to know that quite a few people I graduated with will be there as well.

First day of college....am I really ready for this? As ready as I'll ever be. I made it to my first class with a few minutes to spare. English....wish I would've tested out of this class or something. I'm looking around the room and it's small. A chocolate brotha with cross colors walked in and sat next to me. I rolled my eyes at the flavorful guy. I mean did he have enough colors on? They're blinding me! Made it through the first class and Cross Colors introduced himself after class was over. He said his name was Ekon and he was from Dallas, TX. We started to talk and I realized that he was a lot cooler than I gave him credit. We figured out that we had all our 'A' day classes together. What a coincidence!! So as we walked to our next class we continued to talk about where we were from and where we were living.

We hung out quite a bit that semester. In the Spring semester, I decided to move out with a Cat (a girl I met on my first day of college). We had an amazing apartment less than five minutes from campus. We did the college thing, party, drink, more party. Cat was apart of this engineering club and wouldn't you know, Ekon was a part of  that club too. So needless to say he was over the apartment with some of his friends from the same club all the time. They would call me or Cat to find out what we were cooking so they could come over.

In the meantime, Rick was ever patient. Ok, so Rick and his family were very good friends with my family. We practically grew up together. I would see Rick at church all the time and I felt like I could talk to him about anything. I would talk to him about all my boy troubles and he was always so sweet. He would say things like, "that guy doesn't deserve you" and "you're better than that". Rick took me on my first date to my favorite restaurant at the time. I was so mean to him...why, I don't even know. I don't think I was ready for a real relationship at the time. So I told Rick that I saw him like my big brother. Damn....that's not the only time I let a good one go.....

Preface

Monday Comes will take you on a journey through key life events after high school graduation and beyond. These posts will give you insight into a middle child moving out, relationships, more graduations, marriage, giving birth, divorce, single parenting, and dating. You will read about some interesting people, learn about places I've been, and hopefully find yourself somewhere in these posts. 

Monday Comes the song was written by Crystal Lewis....This song brings so many memories to me. Long car trips with my parents and sisters to Arkansas...oh the memories. Here are the lyrics...

Whosoever hear shout the sound, Spread the blessings all around, Don't you know we all need a helping hand, To get us through the days we can not stand, He puts a song in my soul today, Now what I hear is a golden day, Looking at it now it's so clear, Shelter me for those days appear, Falling on my knees each time I try, You comfort, you heal my soul sad cry, I'm peaceful for I know the winds will blow, I'm anchored in his love my troubles will go, Waiting and watching He gives me light, Through the shadows I still have sight, For heavenly hope He gives me rain, To quench my thirst and ease my pain, I surrender all Lord, have Thy way, You showed me joy through my Mondays, Look and live my weary friend, Days go by and troubles mend, In times of deep distress, All my burdens I confess, Thank you Lord for this day whole, The power of the blood has cleansed my soul, Don't you know the Father allows, Our Mondays to come, Through every trial a little stronger we become, Don't you know the Father allows, Our Mondays to come, Through every trial the victory will be won. 

Where It All Started

November 2000

I walked into a small office on the 11th floor. The room was full of people. I quickly scanned the room and knew that I was better than everyone else in the room. I sat down and clinched my purse close to my side. I look to my left and see this guy. He's light skinned (which I liked) but he has these gold rimmed glasses on. GHETTO!! were the words that shouted from my head. This guy had some nerves. He was going around the room asking the other people if they were there for training and if they had any kids. He gets to me and I say my name and that I don't have any kids. Finally the trainer comes out and tells us to follow. Mr. Miller introduces himself to the group and welcomed us to Risk Management Alternatives. This was my first big girl job making big girl bucks and I'm excited. Everyone looks around the room because they have name plates where we are supposed to sit. Well, you already know who I was sitting next to...the guy with the gold rimmed glasses. He introduces himself as Quinton. 

The training lasted an entire week. Time flew by so quickly. I warmed up to Quinton and he had me rolling the entire time. The guy is crazy. He had nicknamed everyone in the class and was doing impersonations of the trainer. By Friday, Quinton asked me for my number. I didn't hesitate to give it to him. 

Later on that night, I was taking a bath and the house phone rang. My roommate Cat answered the phone. Having known the whole story, Cat came into the bathroom and sat on the toilet in anticipation as I talked with Quinton or the first time outside of work. He asked me if I would like to come over to his house. I said sure even though all of my insides were jumping. 

I got to Quinton's house and immediately felt out of place. I should have known what I was getting into then but I didn't heed the warning signs. I walked into the door and smelled a peculiar smell. Something I had never smelled before. There was green stuff all over the counters and a GUN!!! A real gun was on the counter. I had never seen or been that close to a real gun before. My heart was beating out of my chest. Quinton came out and introduced me to his friend they called Snake, a chick named Sarafina and his cousin Roger. They were rapping over some beat and I thought they were hilarious. Suddenly, they all got hungry and asked if I would like to join them as they went to grab something to eat. I said sure!!! I mean what was I thinking? These people had guns!!!! So I got inside this big black SUV as we drove up the street to a Chili's. We sat down to order but I didn't bring any money. I played it off and said that I had already eaten and that I just wanted some water (knowing my stomach was eating off itself). We left the restaurant and headed back to the apartment. Quinton and I talked some more. He seemed to know exactly what to say and to me he was saying all the right things. He said so many right things that I ended up sleeping with him that night.

And that's how it all started......